Danielle Fishel has learned that raising children sometimes means checking in with herself first.
The “Boy Meets World” star, who competed on Season 34 of “Dancing with the Stars,” opened up about one of the biggest lessons she has learned since becoming a mom to sons Adler, 7, and Keaton, 4.
During an upcoming appearance on John Battagliese’s QVC+ series “Cart Blanche,” Fishel explained that motherhood has taught her how often she needs to manage her own emotions before responding to her children.
“The thing I don’t think anyone could prepare you for when you’re an involved parent with your kids is how often you have to parent yourself while parenting them,” Fishel said, according to People.
Fishel said she has learned to recognize when something her children say or do triggers an emotional response that may actually have little to do with them. Instead of immediately reacting, the actress tries to figure out where her feelings are coming from.
“I have to self-regulate before I can even handle them in that situation,” she said.
Danielle Fishel Has Learned to ‘Parent’ Herself While Raising Her Two Sons
Fishel admitted she never anticipated how frequently motherhood would require that kind of self-reflection, saying she couldn’t have imagined “how much self-parenting I would have to do on a daily basis.”
She has also found a lighter way to handle some of the everyday challenges that come with raising two young children. When possible, Fishel tries to turn a frustrating situation or potential meltdown into a game.
“No matter what the situation is, no matter what the meltdown is, turn it into a game,” she said.
For example, if one of her sons can’t find the other half of his pajamas, Fishel might turn the problem into “crazy pajama night.” She explained that changing the tone of a stressful moment can help shift her children’s moods. Fellow “Cart Blanche” guest and father of two Lance Bass agreed with the approach, telling her, “I love that.”
Fishel shares Adler and Keaton with her husband, Jensen Karp, whom she married in 2018. According to People, the couple welcomed Adler in June 2019 and Keaton in August 2021.
Danielle Fishel Previously Opened Up About the ‘Mom Guilt’ She Faced
Fishel’s latest comments come years after she first spoke candidly about the emotional side of motherhood.
In a 2019 essay for Good Morning America, Fishel revealed that she struggled with “mom guilt” following Adler’s premature birth. He arrived more than four weeks early after doctors discovered fluid in his chest and required several weeks of medical care.
Fishel recalled questioning whether she had somehow contributed to his health complications. She also struggled when feeding issues forced Adler to switch from breast milk to a specialized formula.
Those feelings followed her when she returned to work directing “Sydney to the Max.” After spending 12 hours away from Adler one day and arriving home after he had fallen asleep, Fishel questioned whether wanting a career outside of motherhood made her selfish.
At the time, she admitted that nothing had prepared her for the feeling that being a mother could also mean worrying she was never doing enough.
Years later, Fishel’s approach includes recognizing those emotions before allowing them to shape how she responds to her children. And when an everyday parenting problem can be turned into something lighter, she has one simple rule: “Just turn it into something fun and you will turn their mood around.”
