Valerie Bertinelii has made it a habit to be candid and honest with her 2 million Instagram followers.
That tradition continued when a sweet throwback photo of herself and late ex-husband Eddie Van Halen received unexpected criticism.
A Nostalgic Throwback
Bertinelli was feeling nostalgic when she took to Instagram to post a vintage photo, circa late-1970s, in which she’s laughing in delight while she and Van Halen are seated in a car.
“Photos may fade, like old photos do, but not the memories and never the love,” she wrote in the caption.
The comments section filled up with sweet messages and a seemingly endless stream of heart emojis.
However, not all the comments were so positive, with a few discrediting her feelings for her late ex due to the fact that she and Van Halen divorced in 2007.
‘Strap In, Haters’
A few hours later, Bertinelli followed up that post with another, sharing a video message to address the negativity being sent her way.
“Strap in haters, let’s go for a little ride,” she wrote in the caption.
“It does not take long for me to get a lot of pushback when I post a picture of me and Ed. It used to really bother me. It does not, not anymore. Not any longer, because I learned a lot,” she said.
“So they’ll never quite say the words, ‘You’re not allowed to love your ex-husband, that’s ridiculous. You can’t love him,’ ” Bertinelli said. “No, they won’t quite say that, but they will berate you and berate you for months, make you think you’re crazy until you finally say, ‘Okay, fine, I don’t love him,’” she continued.
Describing those type of comments as “coercive control,” she described them as “insidious” and “soul-breaking” to experience.
“I learned a lot, and you can’t tell me how I feel. Nobody can tell you how you feel,” she declared.
“And, if I ever fall in love again, I’ll make room in my heart for that person, without it touching the love I have for Ed, my son, my daughter-in-law, all the people that I love,” she continued.
“Your heart opens up. Because your heart can hold a lot of love. All of our hearts can,” she added.
“So you can’t bother me,” Bertinelli said. “I love Ed. Never stopped loving Ed. And my heart loves a lot. Don’t you wish yours could too?”
Remembering How They Met
Earlier this year, Bertinelli dropped by Ted Danson’s “Where Everybody Knows Your Name” podcast, where she recalled how she and Van Halen first met.
It all began, she said, when her brother gave her an eight-track cassette of a Van Halen album.
“I had never heard of Van Halen,” Bertinelli admits. “I was into Elton John and Linda Ronstadt. So I look at it and I’m like, ‘That’s a really, that guitar player’s really [expletive] cute.’”
She wound up going to a Van Halen show, and met the guitarist backstage.
Recalling that he was“the epitome of shy,” she continued, “I was invited to sit on the side of the stage, and Ed kept winking at me and making eyes at me, and he would go over and change his guitars, and we ended up going back to their hotel that night. I was crushing on this guy big time. Yeah, crushing big time. And I was 20. He was 25. All the libido stuff was happening, all that stuff. Yeah. And we went back to the hotel. We talked. We hung out by the outdoor pool.”
However, the band was in the midst of a tour, and Van Halen had to hit the road; however, he promised he’d call her.
“He didn’t call for three days,” she said. “And I was getting really anxious.”
When he finally did call, she was smitten.
“By that time I was just gaga and I said, ‘Why don’t you move in with me?’ He moved in with me,” she said. “And eight months later we were married.”
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Valerie Bertinelli Defends Her Emotional Post About Late Ex Eddie Van Halen